CBEB’s

Here’s a historical tidbit about me that some may find interesting. As a teenager, I lived in Libya for a couple of years. My dad was a Gas Lift Specialist for Exxon, and we lived in the little town of Marsa al Burayqah, located about halfway between Libya’s two capitols, Tripoli and Benghazi.

I won’t go into a long story about my time in Libya; I only bring it up because since there wasn’t much to do there, one of the highlights of each week was the new copy of the English-language edition of the Libyan state-run newspaper. It was more of a newsletter than newspaper, but everyone in my family enjoyed it immensely. It wasn’t particularly informative, but it was extremely entertaining. This was the late seventies, when then-president Jimmy Carter had just hammered out a peace agreement between Israel and Egypt, and “Libyan strongman” Muammar al-Gaddafi was none too pleased.

Each issue of The Jamahiriya (Arabic for “Republic”) was about 5-10 pages of rants about the US, Egpyt and Israel. If Jimmy Carter was making an appearance in Gemany, the article would read something like this:

Zionist puppet Menachem Begin’s Imperialist master Jimmy Carter made an appearance in the US-controlled colony of Germany in an effort to shore up capitalist interests blah blah blah.

Without fail, Menachem Begin was always referred to as the “Zionist puppet” and Jimmy Carter was always the “Imperialist master” and one could not be mentioned without the other. Anwar Sadat didn’t get off any easier, either. He was always “Zionist running-dog Anwar Sadat”. Also, Gaddafi was always referred to as “Leader of the Glorious September 1st Revolution”. To string this all together, here’s what an article on a plane crash in Syria would look like in The Jamahiriya:

The proud people of Syria, who have stood in solidarity with the Leader of the Glorious September 1st Revolution Colonel Muammar al-Gaddafi in his struggle against the Zionist puppet Menachem Begin and his Imperialist master Jimmy Carter, suffered a tragedy last Wednesday when a plane crashed over Tadmur, killing all 30 passengers on board. It is not known at this time whether Zionist running-dog Anwar Sadat will be attending the ceremony commemorating the dead.

I was reminded of the Good Old Days of The Jamahiriya when I read this piece by our good friend, Slimy Sal Cordova. Although categorized in the “theology” and “rhetoric” departments, Sal’s article - hilariously titled “618 Synagogues of Satan honor Darwin on Evolution Sunday” - is pure propaganda. For a more thorough breakdown of the article, check out JanieBelle’s take on the subject; I’m just going to address two items in Cordova’s piece.

First off, take a look at this sentence:

This sunday, 618 Synagogues of Satan will honor Charles Darwin (a despiser of Christ) on Evolution Sunday 2008.

I hate to break it to you, Sal, but that’s not “rhetoric”, it’s pure fallacy. Since Salvador’s “Advanced Creation Science [sic]” is nothing but regular Creation Science [sic], only stupider, he has no choice but to try and scare away the people in the pews with some hogwash about Darwin being a “despiser of Christ”. Guess what, Sal? It doesn’t matter if Charles Darwin buggered nuns in Belgium; evolution is still a fact.

Since Sal is too much of a chickenshit to venture beyond the confines of his Young Cosmos compound, he responded to JanieBelle’s post in the comments of his own blog, and somehow managed to outdo himself in the ridiculous propaganda department:

Goes to show, even Darwinist Drag Queen Transvestites, Imitation Lesbians like Lou(JanieBelle) can be useful for something.

Good fucking grief. I’d like to think that poor Sal is so sweet and innocent that he’s basically clueless about such things, but his obsession with sexual deviance indicates otherwise. “Drag Queen Transvestites” is completely redundant. While not all transvestites are drag queens, all drag queens are transvestites. If Sal is going to pull out all the stops in his well poisoning, perhaps he should rewrite the sentence like so:

Goes to show and demonstrates, even Evolutionist Darwinist Drag Queen Transvestites, Fake Imitation Sapphic Lesbians like Lou(JanieBelle) and the moderator at AtBC can be useful for something.

What a fucking douchebag.