CBEB’s

As Cephus pointed out in the comments of a previous post, Ray Comfort is one of those individuals who is “Fractally Wrong“. Sure, it’s an exercise in futility to point out the errors in Comfort’s posts, but this recent post offers a rare glimpse into the mind of a man who once thought bananas are the atheist’s nightmare:

I was called to jury duty in Compton, California, the city that has been called “the murder capital of America.”

Sure, Compton has a high murder rate, but unless neutron bombs are dropped on Washington, D.C., Detroit, Baltimore and New Orleans, the CPT will never be in the running for The Murder Capital of America. Even lowly Gary, Indiana has Compton beat.

But that’s only the beginning. Ray Comfort isn’t satisfied with just being wrong, he has to show the world what a prejudiced choad he is:

I looked across at the two gang members who were on trial for the murder of an Hispanic “human being,” as the judge had put it. They looked nice enough, in their plush suits and ties. I imagined them in their baggies, with their long socks and hats to the side, holding their guns the way gangs do.

That statement is offensive on so many levels, I don’t know where to begin. Just how oblivious does one have to be regarding their own cluelessness to be able to type something so incredibly stupid? Since his target audience is probably too stump-dumb to digest the idiocy of his words, he’s illustrated his post with an equally offensive image. Jesus Fucking Christ… if he didn’t lift that image from some racist website, I’m the Man in the Moon. Imagine if an atheist wrote about his day at jury duty like this:

I looked across at the black evangelist who was on trial for the murder of a Jewish “human being,” as the judge had put it. He looked nice enough, in his plush suit and tie. I imagined him tap dancing, eating watermelon and speaking ebonics the way black preachers do.

The only context in which I could imagine someone actually writing about their day in the courtroom with something so reprehensible would be if the article was entitled, “I’d like to alienate all my readers who have an IQ above room temperature”.

Reading the apologetics of Ray Comfort - and those of his sidekick, Kirk Cameron - a recurrent theme begins to appear. They both act like overbearing assholes, yet they honestly believe they’re making some positive difference in people’s lives.

The signal-to-noise ratio of the remainder of Comfort’s post is too much to deal with, so I’ll sum it up: He decides to slow down the voir dire process by requesting a sidebar with the judge, then goes into some moronic spiel in front of the judge and lawyers about how gang members should be “lined up against a wall”… and preached at. He claims he told the judge they should sentence him to seven days of preaching to gang members instead of giving him jury duty.

I’m sure Ray Comfort thinks he touched everyone’s heart, but I can guarantee that the majority of the people in that courtroom went home and told their wives, lovers, and family members, “You would not believe this fuckhead who was at the courthouse today”.

I used to work for a company doing multimedia presentations for civil trials. I often had to sit through the jury selection process, waiting to set up our gear. It didn’t take long to realize there is one of each in every crowd: The Obnoxious Asshole Who Wants to Get Out of Jury Duty, and The Obnoxious Asshole Who Wants to Get Assigned to Jury Duty. We would bide our time, trying to pick which juror would be the one to slow down the process by trying to get out of jury duty, and which one would make a scene trying to get empaneled. I guess I’m fortunate to have never encountered The Obnoxious Asshole Who Wants to Preach.

Needless to say, Ray Comfort did not get assigned as a juror. Maybe that was his goal all along, but judging from his post, it looks like his M.O. was the same as always: To make an ass out of himself.

To paraphrase Nicolas Worth in Heartbreak Ridge, “If you wanna get out of jury duty, you don’t have to grease him so hard.”